Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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