how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I had to cum in my sink.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
