Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize