I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
