yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Randomize
