even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
