I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Randomize
