what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
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