Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Randomize
