Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Randomize
