He is an equal opportunity slut.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Randomize
