You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
someone get that fucking seahorse.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize