Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles