so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
