i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
