Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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