thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
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we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
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I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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