sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
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I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
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His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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