You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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