Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
