windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
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