I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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