woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
