If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
