we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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