do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
