I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
