I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
