We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
