Please, let me fuck your mom
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
