Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize