I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
