That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
