There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
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