I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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