i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
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