this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
people are starting to question the shark bite story
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
