Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
