I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
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