turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
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