I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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