North Korea, Best Korea!
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Randomize
