I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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