Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
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