The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
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