Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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