Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
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