i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
