Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
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Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
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