I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize