I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Randomize